I've been to the mountains
in a place with no name
with faceless, nameless people
Alone with all my pain
Left behind and out by parents
from wherever it was that they went
and whatever it was that they did
left 6 y/o mind bust and bent
no one said where they went or why
not my known names and faces
nor unknowns on whom I was dumped
with strangers in strange places
they just left without me
without even waving goodbye
in a hurry to be gone
I literally wanted to die
They did this quite often
as I now adult recall
The first time was the worst
I really hit a stone wall
In a place called "camp"
1000s of miles from home
with no ones and nothings
no number or people to phone
How would I survive
What I'd eat, how I'd sleep or where
that was not their concern
I didn't have anything to wear
no answers were given
knowing nothing but fright
Didn't even know what to ask
in the darkest dark night
like nightmares only real
the OG free range kid
who would help I knew not
mostly I just cried and hid
I had a bunk it turns out
But I wasn't to know
no one took time to explain
in their big rush to go
I was the youngest kid by far
The older kids knew what to do
I had no grown up to help
So I hadn't a clue
I have little memory of much
But a pile of logs in the cabin
I thought we could stand them in a circle
and all of us sing inside them
then kids were buying candy
from canteen they called it
but parents left me no money
when outta there they lit
a lady found me wandering
and asked why I was sad
I didn't know how to explain
I thought she was mad
Then she understood
that I wanted candy too
she gave me a dime and a nickel
So I wouldn't be so blue
I don't remember parents
just being left behind
but I recall with clarity
the lady who was kind
Later I was left again
I do remember that place name
the Island of Metlakatla
but the facelessness was the same
No one said why not ever
still haven't to this day
why it was so all fired important
for them to go away
Alaska was supposed to be
a place to missionary
seems they forgot their first mission
was to poor little ole me
I would have liked to help
I'd of been a good missionary
But since they didn't take me along
I assumed the problem was me
What terrible thing must I have done
to make them not love nor care
what kind of child is left alone
not knowing with whom, why or where?
Now he's dead so I can't ask
what the hell went wrong
And all she does is lie
and change the words to the song
Looking back I see it was habit
the camp was not the first when
they abandoned their kid to her fate
it happened again and again
In fact it happened so often
it came as no surprise to me
when they showed up at all
was the biggest shock to see
Wandering alone was the usual
with no adults to be found
from age four not knowing where
or even if they were around.
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