It's my poem and I'll cry if I want to

You scold my poems because

they've bitter bit of sting

the acrid sour anthems 

I've finally begun to ring



My back story was ever 

tart with lacrimal note

so I owe no explanation

and I'm not taking a vote


you demanding I defend

my verse's salty word

shows you weren't listening 

you never saw nor heard


you turn your back now

as you always did back then 

against deaf-blind-muteness

why bother to defend? 


there are none so deaf 

as those who won't hear

none so obtuse as they

who harden eye, heart and ear 


If you still insist on reasons

don't miss your hand pulling strings

flip the mirror roundside right

you'll see how you messed up things


you called me oversensitive 

such rich, arrogant hypocrisy

YOU told ME to lighten up, you?

the perpetually pissed and pouty?


May I ask why it's essential 

I sing a Nutra-sweet refrain? 

what's in it for you to candycoat

and tart up my memory train?


why the gaslighting nonsense

that the problem is the hurt one

that reporting harm is worse than

what and by whom hurt was done? 


My eleventh hour awareness shows

you bound and gagged my voice 

now your dirty blame shame game 

exposes your abuse was a choice 


you claim my remembrances mean

because I'm ashamed I'm to blame

what they reveal is you playing 

your sick Twister DARVO game


but I guess I should thank you 

your agenda demonstrates a lot

my shell-shocked brain now sees

that loving parents you were not


your overplayed your hand

the biter bit by her own fang

you're too up yourself to see 

by your own rope you'll hang


so beware your mask slipping 

you effed around and found out

your pink slip has been issued  

you're fired for messing about 


in this sorry song of mine

it's here we turn a corner

do an about face on shame and

be our lost child's chief mourner 


their pride killed small selves 

time the solipsists were leaving

forget their fanned out voices 

get on with overdue grieving


time to permit myself to

repeat the shit they said

so the caring can help evict

flying monkeys in my head 


I didn't think it needed 

to be reiterated yet again

that tears too long unshed 

only cause us more pain


It ain't pretty inside me 

it's a grubby rubbish pile

But to heal the yuck within

I must dwell on it awhile


if it's inconvenient to hear

if you cannot sit beside me

think how hard it is to live and

don't mellow my harsh reality


Keep your toxic platitudes 

Save them for your rainy day

when your angst overflows

and everyone's gone away


I don't want your cheery

unicorns all sparkly brite 

you scoop their rainbow poop but

beware, lest they come back to bite


I don't give a fat rat's arse

who does or doesn't like my song

It's my poem, I'll cry if I want

you're free to read or move along







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