Going where only Amygdala knows

the girl then recalled

parents looming large

quietly sinister

corrosively in charge 

clown parade balloons

high on pride's LSD

punch drunk delusions

of Grandiosi-Tea

sarcasm IV drips

from mean emojis 

garish caricatures 

impossible to please

love was a blanket

held out then yanked away

knit to bind not warm

cat with mouse did play 

never any words

explain way back when

no exit out of 

her misery then 

then is also now

a spiraling she goes

blinded by betrayal

only Amygdala knows 

I'd love to share a

cheery thought or two

yet pie crust promises 

simply will not do 

airy and airless 

broken by a breeze

pointless platitude

said with careless ease 

bandaged over bleed

just to stem the flow

of mother nature tears

dressed only for show

feather pen laments

articulating pain 

drawing scars as flowers

in healing refrain

no other way out

must pick up my pen

no more to do but

verse and verse again 

Call off my black dog

wind chiming vespers 

angelic melody 

composed by the breeze

four part harmony

innocent or evil

sound of coffin bells

terrifying tinkling 

buried alive foretells

for my soul wonders

by much darkness known

is devil percussion

calling to its own?

when I found the switch

on technicolor TV

it shows what I missed

black and white naivete 

It made me question

all I ever thought 

all their fabricated 

nonsense that I bought

trust wears a double edge

with deadly overbite 

if given too freely 

to them with no right

mercy and respect

likewise cut two ways

didn't understand that

in my gaslit haze 

I've been driven mad

angry and insane

by demon tinnitus

hammering my brain

in my mind's mire

dwells snarling hell hound 

baying for my blood 

invisibly all around 

call off my black dog

I cried in choking yelp

to Boadicea 

from whence cometh help

the raison d'etre 

why I clack this rhyme 

hope avenging angel

makes it here on time

thus explains wind chimes

ringing Morse CQD 

alerting goddesses 

child drifting out to sea

sewer water muck

of rank memory

flotsam and jetsam 

rank polluted sea

not my mother lake 

named Michigan 

nor Elysian fields

I go to again

the lake is my friend

yet I've dates to keep 

miles to go before 

I lay me down to sleep 

and regardless if 

the lake's friend or foe 

I've much to do 'ere 

to dark night I go

I think perhaps that might be salvation in itself. Reading the celestial GPS and seeing my destiny or calling written in the stars. 

Amen. 

Saffron in the Town of Brown

In a youthful oasis

we once played a game 

gave each other a color 

friends with forgotten name

Singapore Sunset Saffron

was a shade assigned to me

once upon a way back 

in sweet land of poverty 

tempest washed up and

foundered flotsam me 

just miles yet worlds from

my dear driftwood sea

nothing much to do but

loiter by the liquor store

nowhere nothing wasteland

too far from the lakeshore

ghosted empty windows

where hope died on trees

framed in asphalt cracks

live amnesiac memories 

I see it always fall

all dead leaf hues of brown

no spring green nor autumn red

the graveyard called our town

not a city nor village

just the isolated farm

too close for comfort 

too apart to keep warm

no employers employ

never any claim to fame

built to be abandoned

with already extinct name 

I tried to share my saffron

pink and purple twilight

Singapore sunset-ness

Outshone by rural blight

don't get me wrong, I

got bleaker shades too

peach bellini cocktails 

with chaser black and blue

the brown was not in them

who in decaying dwelt

just their misfortune

got a shitty hand dealt

I strove to assimilate 

with denizens of the daze

but I'm ever outlander

unfamiliar with their ways

bouncing in and out again

ping-ponged post to pillory

the transient can kicked 

down homeless soliloquy 

so inevitably 

my rolled stone rolled on

leaving no moss behind

to mar the brown landscape

with golden evergreen mind

Trauma Bond Seance

trauma bond seance

summoning the dead

nightly roll call ritual

with all its black dread

you thought this dirge was

just for Halloween 

but it's real recall

of horror I've seen

I grant you it fits

the funereal theme

my zombie led life

quite the spooky meme

I don't choose to go

down their road to hell

it's me been summoned 

by their mourning bell

deatheaters' drink

doom beyond the pale

while we toast the joy

mine's a pint of ale

can I please go back

to moonlit fairy tea

with Raggedy Ann

Andy boy and me?

back to the garden

and the printers ink

I'm sick of drowning 

spiraling down the sink

back to the post light

Narnian reverie 

snowy dune woodland

steam train odyssey

let's get this over

let's walk by the lake

sitting shiva nights

no seance but a wake

Beer Tent Revival

sweet saintly church hymns 

hurting in my head

whisky sour melody

on hypocrisy fed

paradox puzzle

swimmer's ear pain

oxymoron blonde

logically insane

little shrimp spiral 

down his paisley tie

Fibonacci fugue 

I did prophesy 

when dicing with death

watch for sneak attack 

what you shit on me 

bites your anus, Jack

never thought I'd say

did you, daddy dear

what had to be said

you needed to hear

Such a good punter

buying lies they sold

Till I was bankrupt 

now my soul's grown cold

Sick of pew filling

preacher talks the talk

gospel double speak

while I walk the walk

you the Messiah

who can't even crawl

beer tent revival 

hucksters lead them all

cheap sham theatrics

the quack charlatan 

no revelation, just 

a Bible salesman 

peddling religion

from wagon you do

promising healing in

snake oil and voodoo 

spare me your twisted

punch drunk politics

blind evangelism

half-baked lunatics

get out of  my dessert

you don't belong here

this is for mothers 

and fathers held dear

If that's blasphemy

then I'll take that chance

do-si-do along 

time for me to dance

now I'm spitting out

doom you drank on me

pass the Listerine

to flush Insani-Tea 

life's a conch shell

and color in the lines

 

 

Bubble Gum Pink Soap

the bubble gum soap

to scrub printer's ink 

in the press washroom

with the granite sink

soap of neon pink

cleanses grime away 

who will whiten my 

black and blues today?

soul's donkey gray

darker shade of pain

written big and bold

in indelible stain

This Eeyore-ing rain

scoring grooves in faces

weeping down like salt

tales told in the traces

whittling deep and wide

subterranean lows

can't go much deeper

it's low as it goes

elevator mic drop

plummets through the floor

steam locomotive

gate crashes the door

amid the debris

the push pushes past 

chokey smoke roiling 

chaos halts at last 

Notice I said halt

not stop, end nor ceased

slow-motion station

lulls the ceaseless beast

I wish for pink stuff

to wash him away 

but this juggernaut 

is with me to stay. 

But that pink soap didn't work very well either, so I turn to my poems from whence comes some peace. 

Lisping in way-back rhyme

Dune of many steps

runs down to the lake

out to horizon 

underneath the wake

chromatic scale hues

twinkle in the sand

fairy microcosm

I held in my hand

to find my true north

I look to my lake

spirituality

awoken, wide awake

Mandela spinning

slideshow carousel

at Formica table 

known and loved so well

Here's an old photo

but it's new to me

a fat gawky kid

at home by the sea

silly weird  haircut

where long tresses fell

sacrificed to a

god jealous as hell

look at the picture

pretend it's not me

examine closer

now what do I see 

just a little girl

unposed candid peek

not photogenic 

nor a circus freak 

hard to unsee self

without eye of mind

past mental images

so cruel and unkind

I saw different 

I saw inside out

Still can't envision

what I was about

wonder what she saw

squint-eyed in the sun 

blinded by the night

that made the tears run

In elemental swim

building forts in sand

chatters to herself

in this long-ago land

two missing front teeth 

jack-o-lantern smile

chubby cheek chipmunk,

lisp with me awhile?

natter with grandkids

but her I can't reach

funny little sand crab

playing on my beach

I could leave a note

scrawled along the lake

I should warn my girl

of pain and heartbreak 

I'll leave her happy

stick writing in sand

grains of tomorrow

falling through her hand

my hand.